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FINALS!

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): Well, well, well…

Jeff Teague (Hawks): Oh screw off, Kylie.

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): Well... well... well…

Jeff Teague (Hawks): Irving, you’re injured. There’s nothing for you to be “well, well, well…” -ing about. You didn’t even contribute to your 3-0 series lead.

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): Well...

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): well...

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): well...

Jeff Teague (Hawks): WELL?!

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): Well…

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): YOU CAN SUCK IT, TEAGUE! 3-0 series lead! Whatchya gotta say to that?

Jeff Teague (Hawks): It’s not over yet, Irving.

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): Quote by the famous Jeff FA-TEAGUE: “There is NO WAY that a team with Matthew Delladova at point guard can defeat the number one seed.” AHAHAHA!

Jeff Teague (Hawks): Yeah, and I was right. Because you guys have had a Metta-World Peace and Dennis Rodman combo playing point guard. Not Matthew Delladova.

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): Don’t make excuses, bird-brain. Delladova is not a dirty player. The Al Horford incident was totally Horford’s fault and he definitely deserved a Flagrant 2! Horford totally initiated that!

Jeff Teague (Hawks): Mmhmm…

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): And injuring Korver for the rest of the playoffs by diving at his ankles and grabbing onto Taj Gibson’s leg? All within the span of a week? Totally unrelated incidents!

Jeff Teague (Hawks): You can’t even say that with a straight face.

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): Hey, I only need to defend him for another couple days. Then the great Kyrie Irving is healthy again! Onto the finals we go!

Jeff Teague (Hawks): Series still isn’t over, idiot. But I get why you’re so dumb: must be suffering from Derrick Rose syndrome with your injury and all.

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): YOU’RE more like Rose than me.

Jeff Teague (Hawks): How so?

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): You BOTH got the crap beaten outta you by US! LOL.

Jeff Teague (Hawks): US?! More like LeBron and a collection of role players.

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): Whatever, you “Hawks”. You’re just roadkill on our FAST TRACK TO THE TITLE! WOOHOO!
 

Stephen Curry (Warriors): You’re WHAT NOW?!

Patrick Beverley (Rockets): Oh, hello there, Mr. Curry

Stephen Curry (Warriors): …

Stephen Curry (Warriors): …

Stephen Curry (Warriors): …

Stephen Curry (Warriors): Hehe. Ha. Lol. Haha. Lmao. Lmfao! LOL! HAHA! HAHAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Patrick Beverley (Rockets): What is currently provoking your sense of humor, Mr. Curry?

Stephen Curry (Warriors): Quite a few things, actually:

Stephen Curry (Warriors): 1. Watching those two-year olds fight over who will have the honor of being DESTROYED by the mighty Stephen Curry in the finals.

Stephen Curry (Warriors): 2. Seeing that we’re up 3-1 and Houston fans are still rejoicing that they won ONE GAME.

Stephen Curry (Warriors): 3. Watching your pathetic team TRY! LOL.

Patrick Beverley (Rockets): That’s not very nice of you to say, Mr. Curry. We have the utmost respect for your entire organiza-

Stephen Curry (Warriors): PUT A SOCK IN IT, BEVERLEY! There is NOBODY, and I mean NOBODY that can possibly stop the almighty Warriors!

James Harden (Rockets): What about me?

Stephen Curry (Warriors): James… James HARDEN?! But… you’re not even a point g-

James Harden (Rockets): PUT A SOCK IN IT, CURRY! Might I remind you what happened the last time we were down 3-1?

Chris Paul (Clippers): Screw you.

Stephen Curry (Warriors): WHAT. DID. YOU. JUST. SAY. TO. ME.

James Harden (Rockets): You heard me. I said that the REAL MVP is taking this series!

Jeff Teague (Hawks): Holy crap! Someone trash-talking Curry?

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): Grab the popcorn.

Stephen Curry (Warriors): YOU LISTEN TO ME HARDEN, YOU BIG-BEARDED LUMBERJACK!

Stephen Curry (Warriors): ***I*** AM THE MVP! ***I*** AM THE ONE WITH THE NBA’S BEST RECORD! ***I*** AM THE ONE WITH THE 3-1 SERIES LEAD IN THE CONFERENCE FINALS! SO YOU CAN SHUT UP!

James Harden (Rockets): Yes, but I am the one came back from the other team having a 3-1 lead.

Stephen Curry (Warriors): So help me Harden, you hairy piece of garbage, we will MURDER the Rockets next game!


Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): But the Cavaliers will murder you after that.

Stephen Curry (Warriors): Shut up, Injur-ving. The Cleveland LeBrons ain’t got nothing on the Golden State Warriors!

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): Very funny.

Stephen Curry (Warriors): So is watching LeBron do everything at the game.

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): So is watching your daughter do everything at the press conference.

Jeff Teague (Hawks): I can testify to that. That was actually hilarious.

Stephen Curry (Warriors): See you in the finals, Irving. You better be ready.

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): Oh our team will be ready, alright.

Stephen Curry (Warriors): You mean LEBRON will be ready?

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): Kiss my butt, Curry.

Stephen Curry (Warriors): Suck my balls, Irving.

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