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Establishing personalities, part 2

Damian Lillard (Blazers): Everyone that’s here, listen up.

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): Hope you’re not talking to your teammates, or else nobody would be listening, after this summer.

Damian Lillard (Blazers): Very funny. Now, I have a message to pass along from Stephen Curry:

Damian Lillard (Blazers): “Dear dumb-farts, make personalities. Signed, -Lord Curry”.

Rajon Rondo (Kings): Well he’s very nice and respectful, isn’t he?

Kemba Walker (Hornets): So, ummm, I guess we all need to make personalities for each other than?

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): *then.

Kemba Walker (Hornets): What?

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): You made a grammatical mistake by using “than” instead of “then” in an incorrect fashion. Therefore, I took it upon myself to correct you.

Kemba Walker (Hornets): I don’t need you correcting me. Haven’t you read these chats with all of the other idiot point guards? Their all making grammatical mistakes too!

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): *they’re.

Kemba Walker (Hornets): Die.

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): That did not have a subject, which you need in every sent-

Kemba Walker (Hornets): SHUT UP.

 

Damian Lillard (Blazers): Irving, since you went to Duke or something I guess, you’re the smart one.

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): Cool.

Deron Williams (Mavericks): You know who is not cool though? Coach Rick Carlisle!

Jeff Teague (Hawks): Oh man, does Deron Williams have another problem with another coach? TELL ME MORE!

Deron Williams (Mavericks): OKAY!

Jeff Teague (Hawks): *facepalm*

Deron Williams (Mavericks): So like, I just come into Dallas. And apparently here, he wants us to go to practice!

Mike Conley (Grizzlies): Oh my gosh!

Ty Lawson (Rockets): How could he?!

Rajon Rondo (Kings): That’s the most ridiculous request I’ve ever heard!

Deron Williams (Mavericks): I know, right? It’s like:
Picture




 



Derrick Rose (Bulls): #TBT to when the 76ers actually had a decent point guard.

Tony Wroten (76ers): Hey, I’M the point guard for the 76ers now though!

Derrick Rose (Bulls): My point exactly.

Ty Lawson (Rockets): LOL.

Tony Wroten (76ers): You guys suck.

Jeff Teague (Hawks): No, you do. And so does your team.

Damian Lillard (Blazers): Sorry Wroten, but you’re the one who sucks and whose team sucks as well.

Damian Lillard (Blazers): And Williams, you’re the coach killer.

Deron Williams (Mavericks): Damn right I will! Dude thinks he’s going to have us practice…

Damian Lillard (Blazers): Umm… I don't think you understood exactly what I meant.

 

Eric Bledsoe (Suns): You know who always understands exactly what I meant?

Rajon Rondo (Kings): Kill me now.

Brandon Knight (Suns): Hmmm... Let's play 20 questions to find out!

Eric Bledsoe (Suns):  Ok!

Rajon Rondo (Kings): Not even joking. Like any shotguns laying around so that I can just put an end to this misery?

Brandon Knight (Suns): Did he go to Kentucky, just like you?

Eric Bledsoe (Suns):  Yup!

Brandon Knight (Suns): Is he a guard on the Suns, just like you?

Eric Bledsoe (Suns):  Yup!

Brandon Knight (Suns): Is he your FAVORITE teammate?

Eric Bledsoe (Suns):  Yup!

Derrick Rose (Bulls): Get a room, you two.

Brandon Knight (Suns): Does he wear matching culottes with you every Sunday?

Eric Bledsoe (Suns):  Yup!

Damian Lillard (Blazers): This is getting weird, fast.

Brandon Knight (Suns): Was he breast-fed by the same woman that you were?

Kyle Lowry (Raptors): Wtf...

Eric Bledsoe (Suns):  Yup!

Brandon Knight (Suns): Is he...

Damian Lillard (Blazers): IT'S YOU, DAMNIT! JESUS CHRIST, KNIGHT, STOP!

Brandon Knight (Suns): Relax. I was just going to ask if it's me?

Eric Bledsoe (Suns):  Nope. It’s Archie Goodwin!

Brandon Knight (Suns): WHAT?!

Eric Bledsoe (Suns):  Now that I think about it, though, all of those things apply for you as well…

Rajon Rondo (Kings): FOR GOD’S SAKE, STOPPIT!

Damian Lillard (Blazers): Bledsoe and Knight, you two nit-wits are just going to be the duo.

 

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): Ok, as the best point guard here, I have made a rule for this chat.

Derrick Rose (Bulls): Woah, woah, woah. “Best point guard here”? Call me when you have an MVP award.

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): Did you actually just say that you’re better than me?

Derrick Rose (Bulls): Damn right.

Derrick Rose (Bulls): And you know what? I got something else to say! I’m…

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): *removes Derrick Rose from the chat*

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): Hmph. It worked!

Jrue Holiday (Pelicans): Uhhh… what just happened?

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): *removes Jrue Holiday from chat*

Kemba Walker (Hornets): This doesn’t actually work, does it?

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): *removes Kemba Walker from the chat*

Jeff Teague (Hawks): Alright, Westbrook. Enough is enough. Add them back.

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): *removes Jeff Teague from the chat*

Kyle Lowry (Raptors): *removes Russell Westbrook from the chat*

Kyle Lowry (Raptors): Did it work?

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): *removes Kyle Lowry from the chat*

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): My good friend Russell Westbrook, I do plead that you…

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): That I what?

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): Will you… will you remove me from the chat if I finish my sentence?

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): Nah. Go ahead.

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): Ok, excellent. So as I was saying, I do plead that you…

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): *removes Kyrie Irving from the chat*

 

TheBallBlog: Stoppit, Westbrook!

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): *removes TheBallBlog from the chat*

TheBallBlog: That doesn’t work on me, idiot.

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): Uh-oh.

TheBallBlog: *removes Russell Westbrook from the chat*

TheBallBlog: *adds Derrick Rose, Jrue Holiday, Kemba Walker, Jeff Teague, Kyle Lowry, and Kyrie Irving to the chat*

Jrue Holiday (Pelicans): What the heck was that?!

TheBallBlog: *adds Russell Westbrook to the chat*

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): *remov-

TheBallBlog: NO!

TheBallBlog: Westbrook, you have been granted the power of the chat manager. You must not abuse your powers, okay?

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): Fine.

TheBallBlog: But since nobody here is actually allowed to get a good personality, your other personality will be the ball hog.

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): *removes TheBallBlog from the chat*

TheBallBlog: Still doesn’t work on me.

 

Mike Conley (Grizzlies): Hey guys! So wanna hear this really cool story?

Jrue Holiday (Pelicans): If I say no, will that even change anything?

Mike Conley (Grizzlies): YAY! I knew you would. So there I was, just walking on my front lawn yesterday morning to get the newspaper, when I literally SAW a...

Ty Lawson (Rockets): Zzzzz....

Jrue Holiday (Pelicans): ...What? What'd I miss? What's going on?

Mike Conley (Grizzlies): I was telling a story! Listen up!

Rajon Rondo (Kings): *yaaaaaawn*

Mike Conley (Grizzlies): So as I was saying...

Kyle Lowry (Raptors): So the weather has been nice lately...

Kyrie Irving (Cavaliers): Indeed. I do in fact enjoy the warm blend of summer and fall during this time of year.

Mike Conley (Grizzlies): LISTEN TO MY STORY!

Kemba Walker (Hornets): Zzzzz...

Jrue Holiday (Pelicans): ...What? What'd I miss? What's going on?

Mike Conley (Grizzlies): WHY WON'T YOU GUYS LISTEN TO ME?!

Damian Lillard (Blazers): Conley, it's because you're the boring one, due to your boring play style and...

Mike Conley (Grizzlies): My boring playstyle and what?

Damian Lillard (Blazers): Zzz...

Mike Conley (Grizzlies): Screw you.

 

Damian Lillard (Blazers): Oh damn, is that all? We only established 6 of the 12 remaining personalities! We’re going to have to establish the other 6 next week in Establishing Personalities, Part 3! Curry is going to freak.

Stephen Curry (Warriors): Lillard, you little…

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): *removes Stephen Curry from the chat*

Damian Lillard (Blazers): Hey, thanks Westbrook!

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): No problem, buddy!

TheBallBlog: *adds Stephen Curry to the chat*

Russell Westbrook (Thunder): Uh-oh.

Damian Lillard (Blazers): Uh-oh.

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